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Books / Charity / The Purpose Driven Life — No Comments
11
Sep 07

40 Days and mixed-up motivations

A life devoted to things is a dead life, a stump;
a God-shaped life is a flourishing tree.

Proverbs 11:28 (The Message)

We’re doing the 40 Days of Purpose (going through The Purpose Driven Life in groups and in the sermons) again at The Experience.

Even though I’ve been through it twice already, I’m looking forward to it. It’s always a different experience because 1) I’m an ever-changing person and 2) I’ll be going through it with a different group of people.

The timing is also good. Lately I’ve been struggling with the question of how to put my whole life together. On the one hand, I have my work life, which consumes most of my waking hours. I like my work pretty well, but my constant goal in that part of my life is to make enough money (both by saving it and by creating passive income) to not have to work. I have that goal in common with many folks, I think, and it’s generally considered reasonable.

But on the other hand, I go to sites like Kiva and hear how such a small amount of money is changing lives so drastically, and then I want to throw myself into doing “things that really matter.” I have a hard time reconciling the pursuit of money for my own comfort with the state of the world and the Great Commission.

The optimistically pragmatic among you are probably thinking, “Well, easy. Take the money you make with your business and put it into Kiva or other things that matter.” If I was a less-disjointed person, I’d do just that. But I want my money for that new touring bike I’ve been eying, or to afford more cycling vacations, or just to have Daniel around more. There might be some “mattering” side effects (like doing more work on the church website or contributing to open source software if we didn’t have “jobs”), but really, I’m in it for my own personal comfort.

Something has to shift. I think God’s going to have to help me shuffle my priorities or I’m going to go nuts. (Only I hope He’ll wait until after I get the touring bike… and sadly, I’m only half-joking about that…) Maybe He’ll show me how to use my resources better, and give me the desire. I’m really hoping I don’t have to learn by losing everything, though if I continue to be selfish, that may be what it comes to! Definitely prefer to avoid that.

So maybe this 40 Days of Purpose will give me both tools and inspiration to get my priorities straightened out. That’s what I’m hoping for.

As far as blogging it, I’ve learned my lesson… I’m not going to promise to blog every day, but I will blog whenever it makes sense and I have time.

Amusing — No Comments
24
May 07

Where are YOUR kitchen appliances listed?

My toaster tops the list of The Top Five Cutest Gadgets Ever. :P

Hello Kitty toaster

Amusing / Frugality / Simplicity — 3 Comments
23
Mar 07

Ordinary object-hacking trancends the language barrier

I don’t speak Czech, but that didn’t keep me from really enjoying this book of new uses for familiar objects. I particularly enjoyed 17, 21, and 25…

Amusing / Rants — 2 Comments
11
Jan 07

Wow, they really DO sell everything!

branchial cleft cyst on ebay

Amusing / Rants — 2 Comments
15
Dec 06

I wear my sunglasses at night…

Sunny? At night?

7 Habits of Highly Effective People / Books / Life / Psychology — No Comments
18
Aug 06

Mission statement, round one

Thanks to a little friendly prodding, I finally sat down and wrote a first draft of my personal mission statement.

Because I am a nerd and like frameworks, I decided to go role-by-role and state (in the present tense) something I have, something I am, and something I do for each of them (this is particularly nerdy because this is a takeoff on security as articulated in Sneakers).

And do note that they’re in the present tense even though that’s not accurate to my life at this point, because “the unconscious mind chooses a path of least resistance.” So if you read something in this list that makes you go, “Oh, brother. Sarah is nothing like that!”, take it with a grain of salt, know it’s what I’m aiming for, and tactfully tell me how I could get closer.

My personal mission statement

I am a…

Child of God. I have the attention and love of the Creator of the univers. I am confident and compassionate in His love. I draw others toward Him.

Devoted wife. I have a committed, God-given husband. I am secure and interdependent in my marriage. I serve my husband joyfully and show him my love in daily acts of kindness.

Thoughful friend. I have been blessed by God with meaningful friendships. I am vulerable and available in these relationships. I treasure my friends and show them regularly that I care through small acts and sincere words.

Diligent worker. I have been given many talents by God that can be used to help others. I am responsible and big-picture oriented. I respect my clients’ time, resources, and viewpoints.

Student. I have God-given curiosity and a desire to understand His world. I am inquisitive and open to new ideas. I share what I learn in order to help others.

Books / Christianity / Evangelism / Just Walk Across the Room — 2 Comments
14
Aug 06

Motivation for evangelism

As I recently mentioned, I’m reading “Just Walk Across the Room” by Bill Hybels. In just the introduction and the first chapter, there has been plenty of though-provoking material.

The premise of the book is that sometimes evangelism is not about having a polished testimony, or knowing all the texts meant to convert people, but rather, it’s just the willingness to notice another person and reach out to him.

This concept certainly isn’t a new one, but I like its presentation in this book. The author illustrates this idea clearly through a bunch of personal stories. He also tackles the deeper question of “why isn’t this our first instinct, anyway?”

One of the questions at the end of chapter one tackles this a bit. It is actually a set of true-or-false statements:

  • I believe that every person I know would be better off living God’s way.
  • I live my life in such a way that others around me know I believe this.
  • I want to become more of a walk-across-the-room man or woman who jumps all over evangelistic opportunities God lays in my path.
  • I’m willing to let go of other passions so that God’s people can take top priority.

I don’t know about you, but for me, some of those questions are hard-hitting. For the record, my answers:

  • I believe that every person I know would be better off living God’s way.
    Yes (in my head).
  • I live my life in such a way that others around me know I believe this.
    Doubtful. I’d be surprised if anyone would say that, actually.
  • I want to become more of a walk-across-the-room man or woman who jumps all over evangelistic opportunities God lays in my path.
    Yes yes and yes. (This is why I’m reading the book!) The trouble is that I feel like the answer to the first statement has to change (from “in my head” to “deeply in every part of my being”) before that can happen. It seems like a lot to ask of a book to deliver that change. (And yes, before I spark too many suggestions to this effect, I have prayed—and am praying—for this heart penetration. I’m not relying on just a stack of pages for this. I am open to your suggestions, though!)
  • I’m willing to let go of other passions so that God’s people can take top priority.
    And this might be the key to the other issues. I’m tentatively willing. Basically, my take on this is that I’m trying my best to be open to God’s will, but He’s going to have to take care of the desire (again, I’m praying for this, so I’m not totally passive here). If He wants me to lay aside other passions, He’s going to have to give my heart a reason—something that it understands in order to collaborate with my head.

    • How do you answer these questions?

    Books / Life — 3 Comments
    11
    Aug 06

    Sarah, the over-extended (and over-obsessive) non-fiction reader

    I have a bad habit. (Actually, I have loads of them, but I’m just going to tell you about one right now. Don’t want you feeling overwhelmed.)

    Lately I’ve been reading mostly non-fiction. However, if you look at the sidebar section entitled “I Just Finished”, you’ll see that I’m not actually finishing non-fiction (I’ll note for future reference that at the time of this writing, my three most recently finished books are all fiction). This is because I’m a perfectionist.

    When I’m reading a book and it tells me to do something, I want to do it (believe it or not, this stems back to enduring regret about not doing an exercise assigned at a conference many years ago). I’m the annoying person who actually fills in the workbook and feels compelled to finish the assigned reading when everyone else decides to wing it. Despite the fact that this sounds like a good trait (and may be, long term), it’s decidedly unproductive in the short term. This is because I’m a procrastinator.

    I fully intend to do the assignments given to me in my work and recreational non-fiction reading. However, I put them off because there’s no set deadline. And I won’t go on in the book until I’ve done my duty, either (because I’m realistic enough to know the likelihood I’ll go back to the assignment). This results in me approaching meals and other prime reading opportunities with a tragic loss of reading material (I’m not really a “mindful eater” yet; maybe that’s the next step in my evolutionary process). So what choice do I have but to “just glance at” another book until I have a chance to finish the assignment?

    Which is how I got to the point where I’m at right now: stalled at the end of chapter two of “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People“, because I’m supposed to be writing a mission statement; starting chapter nine of “The Search for Significance“, because I’m keeping in time with the group; and at the end of chapter one of “Just Walk Across the Room“, because I “glanced” at it instead of doing my mission statement.

    And guess what? “Just Walk Across the Room” has questions at the end of each chapter! And they’re not just stupid questions that I can dismiss; no, they’re good questions, questions that require mulling and probably bloggingb efore I can move on. Yes, it’s a tortured life being a perfectionist procrastinator!

    (In other news, I’ve just ordered “Do It Tomorrow and Other Secrets of Time Management“, “The Type-Z Guide to Success: A Lazy Person’s Manifesto to Wealth and Fulfillment“, and “Projects in Less Time“…)

    Books / Christianity / The Search for Significance / Wisdom — 2 Comments
    10
    Aug 06

    Off the bandwagon, plus a few thoughts

    I’m sure by now that it is painfully obvious that I’m not doing the commentary on “The Search for Significance” as I’d intended. I did have good intentions, but you know what those pave! As it turned out, I’ve been keeping up with my assigned reading of the book (but just barely), and posting about it just hasn’t been a high enough priority to push out other things in my life (you know, like sleep…). So I’m going to be realistic and declare my intention to not blog the book.

    I have picked up a lot of interesting things from the book, though, and it’s changing the way I look at the world around me. The book’s “big idea” for Christians is this:

    I am deeply loved, completely forgiven, fully pleasing, totally accepted by God, and complete in Christ.

    I always have a hard time internalizing things like this, but I have seen glimpses of these truths, and it’s amazing.

    I’m also struck by how many people believe the lie (my self-worth = my performance + other’s opinions). I guess I shouldn’t be, since I believe it a lot of the time, but I was hit by it again this morning while reading people’s answers to a prompt in one of my dieting groups. The prompt was “I am proud of myself today because…” and almost every response was totally performance-driven. Either they were happy because of something they did, or unhappy because they didn’t do something. None of the answers were “be” or “are” answers; they were all “do”.

    On a different but related note, I really like this quote from Karen Hancock’s blog:

    Great messages lately in Bible class, particularly the one about how “God is able to make all grace ABOUND to you, that ALWAYS having ALL sufficiency in EVERYTHING you may have an ABUNDANCE for EVERY good deed.” ~ 2 Co 9:8

    Just a reminder that I have everything I need — the talent, the wit, the time, the energy — to complete this task in accordance with His will. I am keeping myself focused on that, and not the scary speculations that want to raise their very ugly heads from time to time.

    Books / The Search for Significance — No Comments
    20
    Jul 06

    The Search for Significance: Chapter One – The Light Comes On

    From the book:

    Many of us are hurt emotionally, relationally, and spiritually, but because we are unaware of the extent of our wounds, we don’t take steps toward healing and health. Our problem is not stupidity but a lack of objectivity.

    The author suggests that there are a variety of reasons for this lack, ranging from thinking our situation is “normal,” to trying to be in control, to protecting others (like our parents). But regardless of the reasons, we tend to “develop elaborate defense mechanisms to block pain and gain significance.

    Several of the examples hit home for me: compulsive perfectionism (well, when I bother); driving myself to succeed; helping people to feel appreciated; trying to say “the right thing” to be accepted.

    Too bad this chapter is mostly just casting light on the problem, rather than telling me (in just five easy steps!) how to fix myself (though obviously that very suggestion shows how much is wrong with me). However, I found this encouraging:

    Experiencing His love does not mean that all of our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors will be pleasant and pure. It means that we can be real, feeling pain and joy, love and anger, confidence and confusion.

    Well, I guess that might not sound encouraging, but I like the idea of being authentic even in the worst parts of life. And speaking of the worst parts…

    …Paul instructs us to put on the armor of God so that we can be equipped for spiritual battle. However, it often seems that unsuspecting believers are the last to know this battle is occuring, and they don’t know that Christ has ultimately won the war. They are suprised and confused by difficulties, thinking that the Christian life is a playground, not a battlefield.

    That’s a point that I agree most of us miss. There’s a lot of confusion about what the point of being a Christian is. I think I’ve ranted before about the perception that being a Christian is about being a good person. To actually follow Christ is a harder task (well, at least when compared to looking like a good person), but I have this idea that it’s deeply tied in with our self-perceptions, too.

    I’m looking forward to the “practical” parts of the book. :)

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